Being a lady. What does it mean?

What’s to be a lady? If I‘m a woman, am I lady by nature?

I was looking information about etiquette to include in this new menu in the blog:  Fashion & Etiquette.

I found several articles and great books about the topic. My conclusion is that having etiquette in any social activity it’s directly related with being a gentleman or being a lady.

If a person knows all the rules of etiquette but if he/she is not polite or gentle, or if he/she is fake with the people around him/her, all the knowledge about etiquette it’s not enough.

Education (and not necessary a college degree), it’s related with etiquette. And etiquette it’s related with being a lady (or gentleman) Loving your husband it’s one part, but showing education and good matters it’s another. This is the door for the external world, and it could be one of the characteristics your husband admires in you.

I believe a lady is made, not born. While she may have her mother to thank for setting a great example, a lady earn her stripes through her behavior; not by merely dressing appropriately to an occasion, or writing thank-you notes, but by conducting herself in a way that take into consideration the world around her and how she interacts with it.*

Being a lady is an attitude. It’s about being content with ourselves and confident in our abilities. It’s about feeling good and about looking good, too. But mainly it’s about doing good. *

What makes a lady?

Here, I’ll quote several characteristics included in the book “The art and power of being a lady”, by Noelle Cleary and Dini Von Mueffling.


Grace it’s difficult to define, but we know it when we see it.  It’s a habit of mind that prizes calm and self-assurance over impulsiveness: it’s the poise to respond to what the day brings and the perspective to share one’s blessings. It’s what makes a lady stand out from the rest.

She’s the one to smooth over a disagreement between two people: the one who handles a work crisis successfully without letting pressure get to her: the one who, no matter how frustrating someone can be, take a breath and count to ten instead of losing control.


Dignity is intimately related to grace. But while grace becomes apparent largely in how we interact with the world, dignity is an indicative of self-respect or appreciation of the occasion or situation. It’s an innate right to respect and ethical treatment. A lady values herself not based on how others see her but rather from reaching within.


FAVORITE WORDS: Please and thank you

Please and Thank you are the most-used phrases in a lady’s lexicon. She knows it goes a long way and,     delivered in earnest, makes everyone feel good.



A lady show appreciation for others, this is directly related with the previous one. Using please and thank you it’s a way to show gratuity for others efforts.



Gossip is an area in which a lady set herself apart. One words are spoken, there’s usually no want to undo any damage they may cause. Recognizing that exploiting other people’s personal lives is often driven by the desire to be popular or being accepted, a lady, of course, rejects the temptation. It’s so easy to discourage other from malicious gossip by saying something gentle, such as “Let’s not talk about Jane without her being here” Or just change the subject. It’s really that simple.



A lady is not shy about her capabilities. When she shows confidence in her own value, she is letting other know that she can do the job that needs to be done.

If she’s not satisfied with the outcome of her efforts, she moves on. If you work, remember the office it’s a place of work. This is not to say a lady stifles her enjoyment of her job of doesn’t have fun. Her sense of humor and fun are critical to her sanity in a work environment



Whether taking the time to help a woman get her stroller up a flight of stairs; making sure to recycle; donating money or time to a cause she believes in or raising her children to be the kind of people who will make the world a better place, a lady gives back.

Giving back is its own reward. The power of doing good is the positive effect it has not just on others but on ourselves.


“The most important contribution any lady can make to society is to love and care and nurtures her own children to become the best humans they can be” -Linda Stasi, Columnist, New York Post

A lady puts her children first, no matter whether she’s a homemaker of a CEO. When a lay makes the commitment to being a parent, she enter into a lifelong relationship that she puts ahead of all other and makes her utmost responsibility.

Of course, being a mother is not easy –especially if a woman works, as more of us do than not. Women are taken to task for their choices, either they are stay-at-home mom or try to balance a career and motherhood. Let’s face it, no gold watch or plaque is ever given with as much love and pride as a child’s strung-past necklace or finger painted picture.

Being a lady it’s an art. In the past, women wanted to be a lady. The were thoguth at home or in very expensive schools how to wear, how to speak and write correctly, how to sing, etc.

The more that you act like a lady, your husband will treat you as one. And you’ll bring in him, his nature gentleman side.

“I think ladies expect people to treat them with respect and in turn that’s exactly what those people get back. In order to be considered a lady, I think you have to treat people with grace, sensitivity, and dignity”-Paula Zahn

Source: “The art and power of being a lady”, by Noelle Cleary and Dini Von Mueffling